Monday, December 16, 2002

dredge up the past
shine that bright light on it and show me what I had forgotten about once more
yes, that is exactly what i fucking wanted
to see all those imperfections
remember those goddamn memories


NO


that part of me is dead
don't try to revive it
i don't want to be bothered
i don't want to remember

leave it be
let it lie

Tomorrow is uncertain but
Now is Now, and I'm happy here with you
You
and only you
and the past is dead and buried.
tell me again of what that fucker is doing with his life
after i've forgotten about his existance
give me the update that i honestly don't care about
remind me of that past that i don't want to remember
now that i've finally found my happiness in you
i remember the blackness
the lonliness
the slow spiral into insanity
and the loss of my goddamn identity
that was once the marker of my time with that bastard

Key Word: O N C E

the part of my life that i had successfully forgotten...

you are nothing, shithead.
you are no one, bastard.
you are my past and nothing more.

Nothing but the memory
Of my biggest mistake...
And my hard-learned lesson.


leave me the fuck alone, ghost -- stay away from my love.

Nothing can stop us now.
lucid dreaming of you
so precious, these dreams
time disrupts my slumber...
...wakefulness...
i remember my dreams of you
keeps me sane when my eyes are so dry
bloodshot
tired
red
dry



awaken

Sunday, December 15, 2002

Souls sow Trust
Blood calls to Blood
Family demands Loyalty
Friends deserve Respect
Others get Nothing
And only One claims my Love